(1 min read) Putting medication where my mouth is, I’ve tried almost every pscyh med insurance paid for (spreadsheet below). A hellish 5 years I can’t get back.

Two problems arose: providers never made this chart, I did. Specifically after being asked to try meds for the 2nd and 3rd time. Despite a clinically significant portion of bipolar shown not to respond positively to meds, not one med provider was willing to draw this conclusion, or speculate that maybe I was misdiagnosed.

You think a running list of meds tried and reasons they failed would be standard protocol for any med provider. Yet over my many years, not one did this. Instead, I encountered an inherent aversion to data collection entirely. Intentional or not.

If/when I critique meds and industry practice, I think it’s fair to say I earned that right.

imo you can’t critique meds you haven’t tried. Psych providers will almost never say “I think medication is not for you.” Instead, I hear “well maybe we try another one… again”. Sometimes it’s “well you have to want to be here”. It’s maddening.

Patients describe the period trying meds as some of their worst on earth. I did this for 5-6 years to no avail. And not one provider offered compassion toward the madness this caused, expecting me to try again.

Often, the meds not only failed to work, but made my life much worse.

If providers don’t collect your data, it’s your job to do it for yourself. Make sure you do.

Even more problematic, many psychiatrists will refuse ADHD meds (like Adderall) if you are not willing to take a mood stabilizer. So at one point, my med provider gave me an ignorant ultimatum: lithium or no Adderall.

I took the lithium and obliged, while this same med provider failed to read my 2 years of blood labs. Giving me stage 2 Chronic Kidney Disease. All for a med that wasn’t working, and was proven not to work years before.

I can’t make this stuff up. Quality control is all over the map, or missing entirely. These issues happened with multiple providers.

A spreadsheet listing all the many psych meds tried by a patient along with reasons they were good or bad. Medications are for ADHD, Bipolar, and Anxiety

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